The Pros and Cons of Online Dating for Poly People

On Saturday, February 3rd, 2018

Dating sites are full of singles looking for their significant other. But what about couples looking for a girlfriend or a boyfriend? As most dating apps now allow you to set your status to open relationship, you can also look for a second partner.

There are many poly dating apps which enable polyamorous individuals find their dates online. This comes with a number of benefits, as well as problems.

Online it’s easier to be honest

Online dating makes takes the pressure off the poly individual’s shoulders, as it helps them state from the beginning their marital status. In regular dating game, it might take some time until you find the right moment to pop the big news to your date. When this happens, you never know how they are going to react. And this is very stressful.

Technology took this stress off our shoulders, allowing us to clearly announce our intentions. You can say on your profile that you are in an open relationship, so everyone knows from the very beginning what to expect from you. This is beneficial for everyone in the dating game.

You can also find new friends

Online dating allows poly people to meet like-minded individuals, who also like to engage in a non-monogamous relationship. Some become friends, others establish open relationships, but they create their own community, exchanging thoughts and confessions.

You are more vulnerable

By publicly announcing you are a poly, you also put yourself out there for bullies. The process of coming out is continuous for a poly. Each time they change their job or meet someone new they have to decide if they are going to disclose their lifestyle. But online, everyone logged into the app can see your status and can react to it. This makes non-monogamous individuals more vulnerable.

There are many times when friends of someone who is in an open relationship are trying to convince the other spouse that they are being cheated. And these are only the tip of the huge iceberg that is bulling.

Online dating apps offer diversity

One of the perks of online dating apps for poly people is that they offer a lot of diversity. On a dating site you can swap between dozens of other poly people, which is not likely to happen in real life, where you can’t find so many like-minded folks.

You will be blamed

This happens a lot to people who are in a couple: they are being blamed for trying to cheat on their partners. In the offline world, your date doesn’t know your marital status, thus, they can’t shame you for anything, nor make false assumptions about your lifestyle. In the world of online dating, you have to be prepared for being blamed of destroying your own marriage.

Being poly is not easy when you are trying to find a partner, especially since the concept of loving and dating multiple people at the same time is still seen as taboo.

About - Narendra is the editor of, a freelance writer, photographer, style blogger and PR strategist. He loves fashion and style and unashamedly expresses his interests.

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